it used to be fine between us

sexual habits taken as read

a cup of hot cocoa after telly

then off up the stairs to bed

she never really bothered me

if I was tired, she'd go to sleep

me dropping off with frank relief

no need to count any sheep

Black Friday that started her off

sex manuals on-line, going cheap

eyes glowing, her juices flowed,

her demands le...

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There's a strange woman in the flat above

I fear that lockdown has affected her wits

She's started singing in the middle of the night

Mostly Whitney Houston's greatest hits

I put a note under her door complaining

She rang saying sorry for giving me a fright

We're both young bored and frustrated she said

She knew a better way to pass the night

It turns out she's a ...

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Quite bald, it blew on the by-pass

in slow moving traffic trailing a cortege.

After hobbling on three wheels a garage,

chiding me, buried in a skip its remains.

An ignominious end.

Yet after fifty thousand miles of hail and shine

it left its mark, a latex varnish

while killing prey (insects foxes badgers)

or squealing in pain at sharp bends

when under-inflated

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