I want the Nobel Prize

The one they give for Peace

I want the Nobel Prize

So give it to me please

It’s not that I’m needy,

Ignorant, profane

It’s just I need an ego massage

Now and again

Give me that fucking prize

It shouldn’t be a drama

You gave it Jimmy Carter, Mandela and Obama

Give me the prize

I’m feeling Presidential

Or I’ll push the nuclear button

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Sheaves of stamps with perforated edges

Crumpled postal orders and giro books

Biros, jotters, paperclips and ledgers

Welcoming smiles and knowing, sideways looks

Parcels, diligence and calibration

Columns filled with calculator clicks

Ink stamps thud in rhythm with the nation

Lips seal envelopes with efficient licks

One day they came with boxes, drills and cable

“It’s ti...

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It’ll take 500.

in cabins with twin bunks

It’s not a Cunard liner

No need to bring your trunks

There is no captain’s table

Nor cocktails on the deck

No space for any loungers

On this brutal prefab wreck

It’s a worry for the fire brigade

Whose natural concern

Is how to evacuate the inmates

Should it ignite, and burn

Did I say inmates? A Freudian slip

But this ...

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